PowerShell 2.0 shipped back in 2009 and included over 100 new cmdlets including major new functionality such as Jobs, Modules, and Remoting. That’s great to see, but there’s still so much more that can be done. So, in the vein of demanding others to do things for me, here are the top 6* cmdlets that PowerShell should ship with.
Threaten-Process: For when you want to keep a process from getting out of line but aren’t quite to the point that you want to kill it. Alias: taze
Delete-FileForever: Not only deletes a file, but prevents it from ever being re-created. Pretty handy when dealing with viruses or playing pranks on co-workers. Optional argument -past goes back in time and stops the file from originally being created (the Sarah Connor option.)
Convert-RegistryToIni: Removes the registry completely from the system and replaces it with hundreds of .ini files in the Windows directory. Alias: out-of-the-fryingpan
Set-UACAutoClick: Creates a process to automatically click the accept button on all UAC prompts. For the wishy-washy person that’s too scared to disable UAC but wants to get rid of the inconvenience (usually an MBA.) Alias: miss-the-point
Enable-FullSpeed: Makes the processor run at its actual speed, not the speed that’s been imposed by the Trilateral Commission to keep the masses from decrypting secret government communications embedded in lolcats. Requires the tinfoil hat extensions.
Set-MovieInterface: Changes the UI to have really large text, make a clicking sound whenever a character is typed, add unnecessary maps and graphics to search functions, and the ability to extract gigabytes of image data from half an pixel. Alias: fakeintosh
* The list is limited to only the top 6 because there isn’t a Finish-MyBlogPost cmdlet. Oh, I guess it’s really a top 7 list.
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